Picture courtesy of Finifenmaa
Have you ever felt like you are in love all over again after seeing your ex? Or felt like you could live again in a place you use to hate after revisiting? I started analyzing these behaviors and concluded my heart gets very confused when presented with these situations.
I think I go through a subconscious internal conflict where I confuse “love” for “nostalgia”. I just seem to long for something that I do not have anymore. What is this? I am just never happy? When will it be enough?
Lately, I have been moving around a bit. When I go back and visit, I feel this butterfly feeling in my stomach as if I really miss it and I think is the best thing since sliced bread. But, how come I didn’t feel that way before when I was living there? What causes this feeling of longing?
I have also observed this behavior when it comes to the “ex” factor. When you are in a relationship, you see it for what it is for the reality of it. Yet, when you see the person after some time or distance, it is as if you had forgotten all of the bad things and they look dreamy again. This in turn, makes you “long” for that relationship back. As you can see, it could become a very vicious cycle. Is as if nostalgia played a trick on our minds and confuses our senses so they appear as something they are really not. They even leave a lingering effect.
At first, I felt as if I was the only one this happened to, but lately in having conversations with some friends, they have been struggling with this as well. Is nostalgia and love the same thing? Is it just some sort of enzyme that makes our brain think one is in love again???
But for sanity’s sake…a dear friend said the following to me. Even if your brain plays a trick on you and you really think you are “still” in love with that person, is that person still “in nostalgia or in love” with you back…and if too many things have gotten in the way…shouldn’t you give yourself the chance to be “in love” again—without the danger of it being “in nostalgia”??? For you don’t want to have your heart stomped all over again, because your brain got confused or do you???